ALONE: The Struggle in Social Distance

Survival shows are extremely popular in the Myers household. Of all of the shows available to us on the wonderful worlds of HULU and Amazon Prime, ALONE is without a doubt our favorite. The basic idea of the show is 10 people are taken out to some wilderness and dropped in a secluded location where they will have to survive all by their lonesome. The only contact they have with the outside world during their time in the wild are the doctors that come out to do periodic wellness checks.

A great many of the participants end up going home because they can’t handle being ALONE.

Each participant has some level of survival training and experience. They are each allowed to take 10 items of their choosing with them to aid them in their efforts. It’s absolutely amazing to watch these men and women struggle, survive, and thrive with so few resources and zero assistance. What’s most interesting, however, is that it isn’t generally the lack of equipment or supplies that forces people out of the game. Some have run-ins with wild animals like bears, wolves, or mountain lions and call it quits. Others lose essential pieces of equipment and tap out knowing they can’t survive without it. Others still suffer significant injuries that prevent them from continuing on. But, the single greatest cause of surrender is hinted at in the title of the show. A great many of the participants end up going home because they can’t handle being ALONE.

It’s not uncommon to see rugged, outdoorsy people sobbing into the camera as a result of the loneliness they are feeling. It’s so easy to watch from the comfort of my living room, surrounded by my wife, my kids, and my golden doodle to chuckle dismissively and derisively at the people on the screen. I mean, they are playing a game for $500,000. Many of them can’t even handle two weeks by themselves. When I’m honest with myself, though, I wouldn’t fare any better. I would, without any shadow of a doubt, be one of the people who called for a ride home within days if not hours of putting boots on the ground. Loneliness is a powerful and unpredictable adversary.

We are built to be in relationship. We were never meant to live this life alone.

The first two chapters of Genesis provide a summary of creation. There is a consistent pattern with each “day.” God creates; God sees it is good; God calls it a day. The same pattern plays out until God creates humanity and puts the first person, Adam, in the good garden that has been created in the middle of it all, ALONE. God then makes a shocking declaration; “It is NOT GOOD for the man to be alone.” God immediately provides the solution by creating a second human, Eve, that they, together, might no longer be alone. I don’t think God made a mistake. I don’t think His declaration was intended as an “OH MAN! I SCREWED UP!” I think it is intended to be a warning for us. We are built to be in relationship. We were never meant to live this life alone.

I know many of us are feeling this at a variety of levels today. The space between us is clear and present on a multitude of levels. There are clear dividing lines politically, medically, philosophically, academically, religiously, etc. Those lines of demarcation have always existed, but in our current world we’re also separated physically, by at least six feet in most cases. If that wasn’t enough, I truly believe the social polarization and separation has left many of us divided internally. We can’t even find peace and companionship in the face in the mirror. The struggle is real. In the wilderness of our current world, we are surrounded by people, but we feel ALONE. And, it is NOT GOOD.

in a world defined by “social” distance, we must find space to share compassion and companionship.

I don’t have any grand solutions. Honestly, it’s a struggle that I’m dealing with in my own heart and mind. I think a large part of the answer isn’t to be found by looking inward, but by looking outward. Rather than fixating on our own priorities and perspectives, we have to learn to look out at the people around us. Rather than choosing to highlight the things that divide us, we need to look for the things that bring us together. Rather than trying to weed THEM out, we need to look for ways they are a part of US. In short, in a world defined by “social” distance, we must find space to share compassion and companionship. Even the strongest of us struggle to survive on their own. It is NOT GOOD for us to be ALONE. We need to find a way to come together. We need each other.